Let's do it!
by Felix-RaAk
Summary: After having successfully tricked Shampoo into believing them to be a couple, Ranma and Akane devise a clever scheme to get rid of all their suitors – namely play-acting! RaAk
1. Shampoo

**Let's do it!**

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Ranma ½. It all belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and I am not trying to make any money out of this story – wow, this really gets annoying!

**Summary: **After having successfully tricked Shampoo into believing them to be a couple, Ranma and Akane devise a clever scheme to get rid of all their suitors – namely play-acting!

Akane Tendo was sitting on a chair in her room, looking out of the window with unfocused eyes and thinking about her homework. After a few moments of consideration she came to the conclusion that she could simply make something up, put her pen and exercise book away, leaned back into her chair, stretched her arms, yawned heartily and watched the spectacle nature was offering interestedly.

The sun and the blue sky were concealed by dark and heavy clouds, which – together with a distant thunder – announced an approaching thunderstorm. At the same time, however, colourless and bright beams of pure sunlight broke every now and then through their confinement, illuminating the dark streets and the outline of some faraway hills, which shone resplendent in the scarce evening sun.

With a sudden feeling of grief and a quivering smile the young woman thought of her relationship with a certain black-haired martial artist. Even though she knew that there was more than meets the eye and that they had had good times, which were as rare as sunlight amidst an oncoming storm, it was clear to her as well that most of the time their relationship was shadowed by multiple fiancées, countless suitors, her short temper and his incredible ability to say the wrong things at the absolutely worst possible time.

Pressing her face into her palms, Akane sighed heavily, while she silently pondered over the unfairness of her situation. It almost seemed as if nature was feeling and sharing her pain as a cold but moderate breeze entangled itself in her hair, playing gently with it and as it began to drizzle. The young woman smiled bravely as she looked up again, stood up and closed the open window. Suddenly she heard an extremely noisy crash and a very familiar and hated word.

"Nihao!"

Cursing under her breath, Akane slowly walked towards the door in order to greet her fiancé's visitor and to keep an eye on him as it was forcefully pushed open. There, in the threshold, stood Ranma, who panted heavily, but nevertheless looked thrilled at her.

"Do you trust me?" The young man was barely able to keep his voice from cracking.

"Why?" asked his fiancée suspiciously.

As she eyed him carefully though, Akane detected something strange in his eyes. She had seldom before seen his eyes laughing, because he was always on guard due to the fact that he expected an assault at any time. Today, however, his eyes were practically dancing with excitement and – was it possible? - joy and even anticipation. She saw a spark burning in his eyes, waiting to be ignited by her words.

"Just tell me. Do you trust me?"

"Well, yeah, I guess I do." she answered hesitantly.

"Then just do what I tell you without any questions." he said, while the fire in his eyes flared dangerously. Then, to Akane's complete surprise, Ranma pinned her with his body against the wall next to the door and, blushing furiously, began to take his shirt off. "C-could you unbutton your blouse now?" he asked without looking at her before she was able to say anything.

"What?!" she shrieked incredulously and loudly and blushed even more than he did. "What's gotten into you?"

"No time for explanations. Please, just do it." he pleaded with her.

Akane squirmed uncomfortably beneath him. She knew that he must have a good reason for asking such a favour, but she still felt more than just a little embarrassed at the thought of undressing in front of her fiancé. Besides, she could not move freely, because he had her pinned neatly to the wall and she felt a strange, tingling sensation emerging from her stomach and spreading throughout her whole body like a pleasant disease. Her heart was beating furiously, pumping all of her blood into her cheeks, making her feel light-headed and dizzy – and he felt the same.

"You better got one hell of a reason for this!" she told him and squirmed even more beneath him in order to unbutton her blouse.

"Trust me, I've got a damn good reason for it."he said and added with closed eyes and a tortured look upon his face. "What are you doing?"

"What I am doing? I don't know why, but I'm trying to unbutton my blouse. And that's kinda difficult, because you're pinning me against the wall. And don't you even think about peeking at me!"

"No, you're not unbuttoning your shirt. You're rubbing yourself against me." he said, gasping for breath.

"Rubbing?!" Akane whispered in a dangerously low voice. "You, you dare suggesting? You dare? I, I'm not a pervert and I'm not rubbing myself against you. You're pressing your body against mine. You're the pervert."

"Airen?" The subdued word hushed both Ranma and Akane.

"Shampoo..." he cursed and looked directly into his fiancée's eyes, while picking her up, so that she was forced to encircle his waist with her legs and his neck with her arms. "Hurry up if you trust me."

Immediately the young woman knew or thought that she knew what the martial artist had in mind and hurried to unbutton her blouse with trembling fingers. In the meantime, Ranma completely took his shirt off, threw it away and then ran his fingers through her hair.

"Moan", he whispered, gently brushing a strand of hair behind her ear, after she had finished unbuttoning her blouse and was encircling his neck with her hands again.

She nodded with an unassured smile and thought, as he smoothly pressed his lips against her neck, that she had never gotten a more unnecessary instruction. And just as her wistful moan escaped her lips, the blue-haired Amazon opened the door to her room.

"Ranma!" the young woman hissed furiously at him, while Akane clutched tightly onto him and moaned even louder than before.

"Shampoo!" he panted heavily.

Then the martial artist broke hastily away from his fiancée, scratched the back of his head and looked apologetically at Shampoo, whereas the other young woman hastened to button up her blouse again, blushing way beyond red.

"How, how long you two doing this?" the Amazon asked, pointing at first at Ranma, then at Akane. "How long you cheating with husband?"

"B-been at it for months." Akane answered, trying hard not to grin.

"Akane, be quiet!" Ranma yelled and turned to the Amazon. "Shampoo, please listen to me. It's not what it looks like. We were just..."

"Shampoo know what you doing! Shampoo know when people sleeping with each other!" she screamed, tears welling up in her eyes. "Shampoo don't want husband, who sleeping with ugly, violent girl. Shampoo leave, Shampoo enough of that!"

"Shampoo..." the young man feebly tried to stop her from leaving. "Shampoo! I told you it's not what it looks like."

But Shampoo did not hear him, because she was already storming out of the house, tears of bitter hatred running down her cheeks. The young martial artist turned around to the dark-haired girl and smiled brightly at her, even though he hated to hurt other person's feelings.

"That went better than I thought." he told her, still blushing at the thought of her body pressing against his. "How about we try to, you know, get rid of all of them?"

"Well, Ranma, I think you better get out of here before you go flying through the window..."

Yeah, my English sucks. I know that.

If you find a mistake and I am sure you will, you can keep it, print it, frame it, nail it to the wall and invite me to your house, so that we can look at it together! ^.-

I appreciate every kind of criticism.


	2. Kuno

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Ranma ½. It belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. I am merely borrowing the characters from her. That's it. Annoying. Honestly.

Kasumi Tendo stood at the kitchen table, slicing the vegetables with dainty ease. Her hands moved of their own volition while the young woman looked out of the window, listening intently to the radio.

"_Our correspondent in Nerima is Mrs. Yamamoto. Ai, what happened in Nerima?"_

"_Well, Makoto, it was a horrific sight as we arrived here one hour ago. Apparently a gang of youths rioted, but even the local police constables are at their wits' end, because they cannot explain how some youths could have possibly smashed a solid brick wall. So it is yet to be discovered what really happened. However, there is a witness who swears to high heaven that he saw a purple-haired, foreign woman smashing the brick wall. According to the latest police report, the young man is in a state of shock and was hospitalised a few moments ago."_

"_Our correspondent in Nerima, Ai Yamamoto. Thank you very much."_

The light faded rapidly now. Even though twilight was the woman's favourite time of the day, because it emphasized the beauty of nature due to the fact that the partial absence of sunlight forced a spectator to look at it more closely, Kasumi had to switch the lights on in order to be able to cook an enjoyable dinner. She frowned deeply as she thought about the words of the newscaster.

Before she could make any sense of it, however, the doorbell rung twice. Quickly she took her apron off and walked towards the door. Having opened it, she saw a black-haired, brown-eyed young man, clothed in a blue kimono.

"Good evening, young lady!", he nobly said. "I, Tatewaki Kuno, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High, humbly express my sincerest apologies for disturbing you at this late hour. But I have had the desperate urge to see my beloved Akane Tendo."

"Oh my! Please, come in," she answered good-naturedly and led her sister's visitor in to the living room. "Please take a seat. Would you like to have a cup of tea?"

"I'd love to," Kuno exclaimed and sat down.

"Nabiki, would you bring our guest a cup of tea while I try to find Akane?"

"Hmm, guest?", asked the brown-haired girl grumpily, switched the television off and stood up, leaving her crossword lying on the floor. "Oh, it's you, Kuno-baby."

"Well, if it is not Nabiki Tendo," the young kendo master said after the other woman had left the room. "You seem to be in a bad temper."

"That's none of your business, Kuno-baby," she told him and handed him a cup of tea. "What are you doing here?"

"I am here to see my beloved Akane!"

"Well, Kuno, is dating girls, especially my little sister, all you ever think about?", she asked a little sourly, but nonetheless kept a straight face.

"Fear not, Nabiki," he assured her. "I have no intention of asking you out."

"And for that, I am grateful."

In the meantime, the eldest female Tendo walked towards the training hall, where she assumed her little sister to be. Soon enough she heard several loud, but incomprehensible yells and moans. As she came closer to the door, however, she caught some scraps of a rather aggressive conversation.

"What's up with you anyway?", a male voice asked, panting heavily.

"Wha-?! You used me to get rid of Shampoo! That's what's up!", Akane answered furiously. Suddenly Kasumi heard a loud crack and, knowing her little sister, flinched sympathetically.

"Ahh! Leggo of me, you tomboy!", Ranma screamed. "What's the matter? It worked, didn't it?"

"Ranma, I just don't like being used," she whispered dangerously. "But seeing that you seem to enjoy it, I think I may use you as my dummy a little longer."

Instantly Kasumi knocked on the door and was greeted by an awfully cheerful young woman only seconds later. As she looked behind her sister Kasumi saw Ranma lying on the floor. And the young man, she thought, did not look quite as cheerful as his fiancée did. He was lying on his back, wincing at every single movement.

"What is it, Kasumi?"

"Akane, don't you think he's had enough?", Kasumi asked, nodding towards the pitiful mass on the floor.

"I thought so, too, but he just keeps on saying stupid things," she answered angrily. "Is there anything else you want to tell me?"

"Well, Tatewaki Kuno dropped in a few moments ago and he wants to see you," Kasumi said.

"Tell him...," she sighed heavily, but suddenly her eyes lit up. Hastily she turned her head around to her fiancé. "Tell him to meet me in the training hall, Kasumi. Hurry up!"

Not knowing what her sister was up to, Kasumi simply nodded her head and walked back to the living room. There she met Nabiki and the young gentleman engaged in a quarrel.

"I protest!", he argued, seizing some pieces of paper. "The heavens themselves would weep at a thousand yen per shot!"

"So, you don't want them?", Nabiki asked, taking the photos back.

"I take them all," he answered and gave her some money. "You truly are greedy, Nabiki Tendo."

"Well, thank you, Kuno-baby," she answered, counting the money and smiling at him.

Suddenly Kasumi cleared her throat. Both Nabiki and Tatewaki turned around to her.

"Akane wants to meet you in the training hall."

Having thanked her loudly and bade the two women goodbye, the swordsman slowly walked towards the training hall, pondering over the question why his beloved Akane had suggested such a private meeting point. Suddenly he jerked to a halt and stood routed to the ground.

"You, my fair Akane Tendo, want to meet me in private to let me hear with my own two ears how you love me," he said to himself and began to run towards the training hall. "Ah, to me my love, for the day grows late and I thirst for thy kisses."

Before he managed to reach the door of the training hall, though, he heard his loved one yelling at someone else. So, instead of bursting through the door, he curiously waited in front of it in order to hear more of her beautiful voice – but her voice alone was not enough. Soon he found that he had to try to catch a glimpse of her. So he opened the door silently and left it open ajar, but he did not like what he saw. Ranma was lying on the floor and Akane was sitting on top of him.

"Are you serious?", she shrieked loudly. "You still haven't been able to seduce Kodachi Kuno? She was all over you yesterday."

"It ain't that easy," he answered slowly. "Why don't you try to seduce her brother? He's telling you every other day that he wants you."

"Oh, honey, how often do I have to explain this?", she asked lovingly, sighing heavily and putting her hands on his chest. "I am the good girl and you are the bad guy. You seduce Kodachi and pretend to marry her and I, the heartbroken ex-fiancée, derive comfort from her brother. Then, without attracting attention, we urge them to make a will and after we've killed them, we can keep the house and the money."

A yelp escaped Kuno's lips as he heard of their plan. The two young lovers, however, seemed to be too occupied with their conversation to notice the suspicious sound. Immediately the swordsman covered his mouth with his hand and hid behind some nearby bushes, still attentively listening to every word they spoke.

"But what about that moron's pigtailed goddess?", the man asked doubtfully. "What if he does not want to be with you but her?"

"No problem there," she answered with a mischievous grin. "She's gone."

"Gone?", he asked dumbfounded.

Behind the bushed outside the training hall a certain young gentleman opened his eyes widely, turning pale. He panted heavily and formed a silent 'gone' with his mouth. His heart was beating furiously now.

"Gone," she repeated. "And I'm going to tell Kuno of her departure. She went to her uncle in - let's say Africa? - and is not going to come back any time soon. What do you think of that?"

"You're a genius!", he happily exclaimed. "That's why I married you."

"And why did I marry you?", she teasingly asked.

"'Cause I'm so damn handsome?", he suggested and then quickly stood up. "I think I heard something."

Hastily Tatewaki jumped up and was about to run back to the house, when he heard Akane's words.

"Don't worry! It cannot be Kuno, because he surely would have come bursting in, yelling something like: 'Fear not, my Venus. Thou art the goddess of love and beauty. See how I worship you, my love'," she pointed out to him and they started laughing. "Where's that idiot anyway? He should be here by now."

"Doesn't matter, does it?", the martial artist said. "I think I'll invite Kodachi to dinner tonight. Then we can begin performing our task. And now we gotta play act again."

Instantly the young swordsman tried to run away and call for his faithful servant, but he could neither move nor speak. Suddenly he heard the door open behind him. Turning around slowly, he looked like a deer caught in headlights as he faced the quarrelling couple.

"You, you pervert!", she screamed after she had left the training hall and stomped away angrily, almost bumping into a shocked Tatewaki Kuno.

"It's not what it looks like!", Ranma answered hotly, leaving the training hall right behind her. "Kuno, what're you doing here?"

"Ranma, don't be rude," Akane scolded him, smiling at Kuno. "I've got an idea! Why don't you stay for dinner?"

"No! No! I-I ju-just w-wanted to, to tell you that we are leaving," he stammered and then, having come to a decision, continued more bravely: "I wanted to tell you that we, that is my sister Kodachi, I and my father, are leaving. We are moving to Hawaii because of our father. I just wanted to say goodbye."

"Oh, but that's awful!", the young woman exclaimed and watched how Tatewaki Kuno turned around and left the house as fast as he could without running.

"Sasuke! Sasuke! Where are you?"

"Here I am, master," the faithful ninja said, after having appeared out of nowhere.

"Tell Kodachi and her father that they are not allowed to leave the house any more," he ordered. "And then make some preparations, for we will be moving to Hawaii tomorrow!"


	3. Ryoga

**Ryoga**

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Ranma ½ or any of its characters. It all belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and I am merely borrowing her invention – and I am not trying to make any money out of it.

Thanks to: _Flames Chaos and Wolf, Hitman25ad, krizue, XxkanaxX, Wrin, jd, a-chan, Shikumo12, James Birdsong, sara, Shadowalker666, chibi-prince! _Thanks for your encouragement!

At nightfall the world changed from a bright, lively, crowded market to a dark and gloomy oasis of calm. The hectic pace slowly faded as the never sleeping, life-giving sun, having lit and guarded the way of the humans, made room for the pale face of the moon, allowing it to cast a cloud over the life on earth. Imprisoned by the shadowy curtain of the night, the world then unjustly – due to its misdeeds – slept the sleep of the just.

At sunrise, however, the world awoke from its peaceful slumber again and its inhabitants watched as the sun chased the night away. The first sunbeams broke through the veil of darkness like the smallest spark of hope through the heaviest cloud in front of a despairing man's heart and warmed the planet up.

At this time of the day two teenagers walked towards their school, one of them on a fence next to a small, but nevertheless swiftly flowing river, the other one beneath him on the pavement. But neither the dark-haired young woman nor the martial artist with the raven hair had an eye for the dawning. Both of them looked expectantly and nervously at a place in front of them. Suddenly the young man stopped dead in his tracks.

"That's the place," he said and waited for a moment before he continued. "She should have appeared by now."

"Maybe she overslept?", Akane suggested.

"Nah, can't be," he replied with a big smile on his face. "Shampoo ain't like that. She's been glomping me at the same time every day for the last year or so."

"Then she's really gone?", she asked carefully and then shook her head. "I still can't believe it worked."

"Well," he answered slowly, jumped off the fence and put his arms behind his head, hands clasped, elbows out. "I think I'll miss her."

Akane's big grin vanished within seconds. Her eyes grew wide in surprise and then narrowed rapidly as she grasped the whole extend of his words. Beside herself with rage she opened her mouth in order to shout at him, but, given that it would only warn him, she closed it again. The young woman stepped closer to him, her aura blazing dangerously, while he talked to her.

"I think I'll miss her because of all the attention you were giving me when she was around", he said casually, turned around and, seeing that she looked at him with utter astonishment and surprise, nudged her forehead with his forefinger. "Gotcha!"

"H-hey! That's, that's not fair!", she exclaimed as he jogged away from her.

The young man turned around to his fiancée again, poking his tongue out at her, but did not understand why she was smirking. Only seconds later, though, he knew it, because he was splashed with cold water by an old lady. The now red-haired woman scowled at Akane.

"Serves you right!", she laughed at her companion and rummaged around in her school bag.

"Shaddup!", the female and wet Ranma muttered. "Do we have time to go back to get some hot water?"

"Nope," Akane answered cheerfully and took a Thermos flask out of her bag. "But since that's happened '_at the same time every day for the last year or so_' as you've just phrased it, I took along some hot water this morning."

"Thanks, Akane," the martial artist thanked his fiancée after she had poured the water over his head and he had transformed into a man again.

Only a few minutes later they arrived at their school, for once not being greeted by Tatewaki Kuno's challenge. Together they stood at the gate and waited for the wannabe samurai to arrive – but he did not come. Instead, other pupils walked past them and friends bade them good-morning. Ranma and Akane just stood there and looked at each other, not noticing the crowd that slowly but surely collected around them.

"I could get used to this, you know," said the young woman.

"Yeah, I certainly won't miss the Blue Blunder of Furinkan High," he answered with a smile.

"We won't miss him, but I think I may know someone who will, someone who's had a crush on him for a long time now," she whispered to Ranma.

"Do you mean this cheerleader? What was her name again? Mariko?"

"No." Akane shook her head slightly. "It's Nabiki!"

"No way!", the young man exclaimed incredulously. "That can't be true! No way!"

"You'll see for yourself soon enough," Akane answered meaningfully. "But anyway, imagine what it would be like to get rid of all of them. You see, it's quite peaceful now, but with Ukyo gone, it'll be beyond words."

"What about Ryoga?", he asked, raising his eyebrows.

"I don't know. It was kinda nice having him around," she replied, turning her back on him and grinning broadly.

"What do you mean?" The young man drew his eyebrows together and looked closely at his fiancée. He had always been a little jealous when Akane had talked about other man in his presence, although he would never admit it to anyone.

"It was kinda nice having him around because of all the attention you were giving me when he was there," she said, nudging his forehead with her forefinger and smiling at him. "Gotcha!"

"Well, well, if it isn't our two lovebirds," they heard a female voice teasing them, before Ranma could answer to Akane's payback. "I know that the early bird catches the worm, but I just can't see what worm you two lovebirds want to catch by giving the whole school quite a show of your affection."

Only now did the two teenagers notice that they were surrounded by a rather large crowd. Hastily they moved as far away from each other as possible, a blush starting to creep over their features as they heard their classmates and friends whispering and saw them pointing at themselves. Ranma cursed under his breath, but the young woman spoke loudly to her sister.

"Well, Nabiki, can it be that you are teasing us just because the one you have a crush on is not here today? You don't have to look at me like that, Sis. I'm talking about Kuno."

Most of the students, who had been whispering before, fell silent at once. A few, however, quickly went away to tell their friends about the news. The remaining pupils watched Nabiki Tendo curiously, waiting for her answer. As the Ice Queen hesitated, the crowd saw the bold statement confirmed.

"I don't have a crush on him," the Ice Queen, whose masquerade seemed to melt away due to the heated discussions by the crowd, contested the assertion coolly. The crowd did not listen to her, though, and dispersed itself to inform others about the events.

"Ranma!", Akane suddenly called for the young man. "I have an idea, but I need to talk to Nabiki. Just go ahead and I'll catch up with you later."

The martial artist shrugged his shoulders, turned around and went to his classroom, while the young woman walked to her sister, who was surrounded by some classmates.

"No, I'm not in love with Kuno," she said irritatedly, looking mirthfully at her sister. "Would you excuse me just a minute? There's someone I need to talk to."

Nabiki then beckoned her sister to follow her and walked out of the school gate. After a few moments she turned around, leaned against the wall and, seeing that noone but her sister could hear her, started to laugh.

"Well done, my little sister," she told her. "Now, instead of gossiping viciously about you two, they are going to spread gossips about me and Kuno. I just want you to know that I will get my payback for this."

"I thought as much!", sighed Akane, but continued nonetheless. "But, Nabiki, I have a favour to ask you and I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important."

"Well, come out with it!", she exclaimed, looking carefully at her sister. "I have other business to attend to."

"All right, Nabiki. We, that is Ranma and I, need the house for ourselves."

"Why?", she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I-I can't tell you that yet," she answered earnestly. And don't tell anyone about it for that matter."

"Well, if you want to be cagey about it, that's fine by me. In the end I'll find out anyway," Nabiki said and looked at the sky. "When do you want to have the house for yourselves? How long do you want to be alone? And what do I get for luring father, Mr. Saotome and Kasumi away from the house?"

"Let's see, today's Friday. It would be great if we could be alone the whole weekend, you know." Akane scratched her head regretfully. "And you can ask for anything in return."

"Anything I want?", she asked. "Well, that definitely sounds most interesting. It'll be hard to come up with something not too far-fetched though, but it's a deal! You'll have the house to yourselves by tonight, my little sister, and can do whatever you _need_ to do."

Akane nodded in agreement without really thinking about it. Then she turned around and ran towards her classroom, ignoring her two best friends, Sayuri and Yuka, who exchanged knowing glances and smirked. In front of her fiancé, who was standing next to his friend Daisuke, she jerked to a halt, grabbed hold of his arm and panted heavily.

"Need to talk to you," she whispered. "Now!"

"All right," he answered. "Dai, I'll be back in a minute."

The young man nodded approvingly, turned around to his best friend and talked to him, while Akane dragged Ranma out of the classroom, down the corridor and shoved him, after she had assured herself that noone could see her, into a broom closet, closing the door behind herself. Little did she know that her trip to the closet passed not as unnoticed as she had thought.

"No way!", Hiroshi said. "Yuka and Sayuri are cuter than Akane and besides, she's already taken."

"Yeah, that's true, but I still think Akane's cuter. Wait a second, wasn't that her dragging Ranma out of the classroom!?"

"Kinda uncomfortable in here," Ranma stated, because the two martial artists could hardly move inside the broom closet.

"The end justifies the means," she replied, moving a little away from a dirty rag and pressing her body against his. Their faces were only inches apart and Akane was sure that he could see the bright blush upon her cheeks, even though it was pitch dark. "I've got a plan to get rid of Ryoga, but we have to act again."

"All right, then, let's do it," he answered cheerfully.

"Okay, thanks to Nabiki, we've got the house to ourselves the whole weekend", she told him and then accidentally stepped onto his toes.

In the meantime almost every student of Furinkan High had gathered in front of a certain broom closet. Hiroshi and Yuka were kneeling in front of the door, eavesdropping on their best friends and repeating every word they could understand. These words were then repeated by numerous other pupils, so that even the teachers, who were standing at the corridor's end, could hear them.

"All right, let's do it!"

"We've got the house to ourselves the whole weekend," Yuka said. Suddenly she moved hastily away from the door, a blush appearing on her cheeks. "W-w-we've g-got to s-switch po-positions."

"Why do we have to do it in here anyway?" Hiroshi did not have to repeat the words, because they could clearly hear Ranma's voice now. "We've got the house to ourselves!"

The martial artist jerked the door open. Instead of an empty corridor, though, he met his friends and almost the whole school there. All of them were staring at him in utter surprise. Most of the girls were blushing and most of the guys smirking. Slowly he turned around to his fiancée.

Akane was sitting at the table in the living-room of the Tendo residence, waiting for lunch to be served. Hesitantly she looked up at her fiancé, who was sitting next to her, blushed again at the thought of her friends' teasing words and wondered whether he had had the same rough treatment to endure – after her friends had caught them coming out of the broom closet together, Ranma and Akane did not have the slightest chance to talk to each other in school for the rest of the day.

"Ranma and Akane." Nabiki walked around the corner and sat down at the table, grinning like a Cheshire cat. "Are the rumours true?"

"What rumours?", asked Kasumi as she entered the room, carrying a food tray and thus not noticing the pleading glance her little sister shot at Nabiki. "By the way, do you know where father and Mr. Saotome are?"

"I bought them a trip to Osaka," the brown-haired woman answered. "And you should pack your bags, too, because I'm asking you out to a spa for the weekend."

"Oh my, that is nice of you, Nabiki, but I'm afraid I cannot come along with you, because there is so much yet to be done here," the eldest female Tendo said apologetically.

"That's no problem!", Akane told her sister enthusiastically. "Ranma and I can do it! And you deserve a weekend for yourself after all you've done for us."

"I don't know, Akane. Why don't you go with her?"

"Sis, Akane is right. You need to take a few days off." Kasumi thought about it for a few moments and then nodded, while she laid the table.

"All right, I'll go. And now enjoy your meal!", she said with her usual gleeful smile. "Nabiki, you said something about rumours."

"Ah, well," she replied. Instantly Akane blushed right up to her ears and the martial artist chocked on his food. "I heard that Ranma and our dear little sister were making out in a broom closet in school today. I don't know if it's true, though."

After many stammered, heated denials and promises that they had done nothing improper, Kasumi finally, albeit grudgingly and against better judgement, allowed Ranma to stay in the house with her little sister and went upstairs to pack her bags. Then, having returned downstairs, remarked what they had to do and said what they should refrain from doing, she left with her sister.

"Puh!", the dark-haired girl exclaimed as she closed the door. "So far this day's been the worst day of my life."

"Then let's turn it into the best day of our life. What's the plan?"

Three hours later Akane returned home again, wearing a light blue shirt and a knee-length skirt, and was welcomed by her fiancé at the door. Slowly she walked up to him and handed him the grocery bag.

"Well, what do you think?", she asked somewhat sceptically, pointing at the slight bulge at her stomach. "Sayuri's done her best, but I don't think it's absolutely convincing."

"I don't know," he answered truthfully and went into the living-room. "Looks like you've gotten fatter. What should we do now?"

"Well, I'm going to cook dinner now and you are going to sit here and wait for Ryoga. And I hope you can act your part."

"What? You and cooking? Ah, I don't feel like eating your poisoned food to-pff", he answered, but was cut short by his fiancée, who had hit him mercilessly.

"That was a test and you failed miserably," she snarled at him. "You better get into your role while I'm cooking dinner, _honey_."

"Y-yes, dear," he panted.

The young man quickly sat down and watched the sky, wondering whether Ryoga or Akane's cooking would kill him. Then he closed his eyes, yawned heartily and enjoyed the quietness of his familiar surroundings. Suddenly he heard a distant blast, though, and opened his eyes again.

"Where am I now?!", a man yelled. "This is all your fault, Ranma Saotome!"

"Ryoga?", the martial artist asked as he saw a dark-haired boy, wearing a yellow bandanna and holding a large rucksack and an umbrella in his hand, appearing amidst a cloud of dust.

"Ranma," he answered, walking towards the young man. "Prepare to die!"

"Woah, calm down, pal, or Akane's going to kill us!", Ranma exclaimed, smiling brightly at his rival. "It's good to see you! It's been years since you last dropped in. Where have you been?"

"What do you mean it's been years?", he asked. "And where is everybody?"

"What do you mean?" Ranma looked at him in surprise.

"Where's everybody?", the part-time pig asked again. "Akane, Kasumi, Nabiki, your father, Mr. Tendo?"

"Nabiki is in America," he said, eyeing Ryoga carefully. "Studying, I think. Kasumi moved in with Tofu, father and Mr. Tendo with my mum and Akane's in the kitchen. Did you get my letter, Ryoga?"

"Why are they all gone? And what letter?"

"Ah, that explains a few things!", Ranma exclaimed. "Akane and I, well, we married three months ago."

"You're lying," the other young man instantly said. "Why would she marry you?"

"Who's there, honey?", a female voice asked before the young man could answer.

"It's Ryoga."

Immediately Akane went to the living-room, welcoming their visitor with a warm smile.

"It's good to see you, Ryoga! How are you? It's been years! Where have you been?"

"I-I've been training in the mountains and and..."

Without thinking about it, the young woman laid her head onto her fiancé's shoulder, who put his arm around her waist. Akane snuggled even closer into him now, wondering why it was so easy for her to pretend to be in love with her stubborn, arrogant, rude Ranma. She closed her eyes for a second, enjoying this warm embrace. As she opened them again, however, she saw that Ryoga had paled visibly.

"Your belly?", he numbly asked, swallowing the lump in his throat.

"Yeah, I'm pregnant!", she exclaimed, beaming with joy. "Isn't that wonderful? Ryoga?", she suddenly asked considerately as she saw him grimacing. "Are you all right?"

"W-wonder-wonderful, y-yeah," he stammered. "I-I'm f-fine, j-just a little h-hungry."

"Why don't you join us for dinner, then?"

"N-no, I'm, eh, I'm not hungry at all, I-I'm just tired."

"Why don't you stay for the night, then?"

"N-no, I've got to, eh, leave, find Akari!"

Hastily he turned around and ran away...

_I haven't slept in 48 hours, but, damn it, that was worth it! I appreciate every kind of criticism – auch auf deutsch!_


	4. Ukyo

**Ukyo**

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Ranma ½. It belongs to Rumiko Takahashi, I think. I am not trying to make money with this story.

_My sincerest 'thank you' to: Hitman25ad, Carnath, Shadowalker666, XxkanaxX, vleroy728, jdcocoagirl, krizue, -siMpLe-reActiON- [I had to check that twice before I got it right! :) (by the way, if you take all the capital letters in his name and rearrange them a bit, you'll get the name of character from The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time :))], a-chan, WanderingStarmaster, Mystical-Dreamer57, V EPSILON, epain! Thank you so much!_

_Yeah, you are right. Shampoo should have acted differently and due to that I am going to rewrite the first chapter :] - thanks for your criticism!_

Gradually the brightly coloured day made way for the dark night. The pale moon, who watched the twinkling lights of the cities, which reminded him so much of his protégés', the stars', cheerful play, beneath him suspiciously, took his ancestral place high up in the firmament again. As the first stars finally lit up, he knew that his companions' brilliance surpassed the worlds' light to the point that he lost his sullen view and gazed absent-mindedly at his own reflection in a tiny pond.

At the same time a black-haired man, sitting not far away from that very pond, marvelled at the beauty of the moon. Closing his eyes, he thought of his fiancée and the scheme they had devised to get rid of all their suitors. He smiled faintly, opened his eyes again and turned around just in time to see the young woman, who was lost in her thoughts, entering the living-room. Ranma gazed at her slight figure, illuminated by the pearly-white moonlight, and could not help noticing her elegance and her bright, strong aura. His heart skipped a beat as she smiled at him.

"What are you looking at?", the blue-haired woman asked curiously, having taken a seat next to him and having noticed his look.

"N-nothing," he hastily answered, discarding his train of thought, and stared at the ceiling.

"You know," Akane said after a few moments of silence and handed him an empty plate. "I wonder why Ryoga was so shocked. He's always been so nice to me, so I thought he would be, well, happy for us, but I think he's not."

"What a surprise," the martial artist grunted contemptuously.

"What do you mean?", the young woman asked in surprise. "Is there something I should know? Wait a moment, could it be that he.... he's ill?"

"Are you kiddin' me?", Ranma asked and looked at her in disbelief. "Maybe you're coming down with something?"

The short-tempered girl grabbed the next best thing she could get hold of and threw it at him. Before the black-haired youth could react, he received a savage blow on the head by an empty vase.

"You tomboy," he growled at her and rubbed the back of his head, but Akane did not react to his insult. She sat quietly next to him, folded her hands in her lap and took a deep breath. Her cheeks reddened and she gnashed her teeth in anger, but her voice was as calm as a light summer breeze.

"We should not insult or hit each other for the time being," she mumbled. "What if Shampoo or Ryoga had decided to come back? Or what if Ukyo had walked in on us? Then our little game would have been over. So, Ranma, what's up with Ryoga?"

"You were throwing stuff at me", the martial artist cursed under his breath, but, seeing her rising an eyebrow, continued casually, eyed his supper suspiciously and then grimaced. "Well, I guess it can't be helped. Ryoga's had a crush on you for God knows how long. So what did you expect? Anyway, what's that supposed to be? Dinner?"

"Yeah, that's our dinner. And I cooked it myself, so dig... wait, what did you say?", she exclaimed and looked at him incredulously, her mouth gaping open, her eyes slightly bulging and her cheeks reddening as a furious blush began to creep upon them.

"Is this supposed to be our dinner?"

"No, before that!"

"Oh, you mean P-chan having a crush on you?", he asked, glowering at his fiancée. "Don't tell me you didn't notice."

"Ah, no way!", she said, wildly gesticulating, but nevertheless blushing. "We've been friends for months now, nothing more."

"And what about all the gifts and the way he's been acting towards you?"

"Oh my God!", she whispered, having thought about her fiancé's words for a moment, and hid her face in her hands. "I don't believe it! How could I've been so stupid? If I had known, then, then..."

"Then what?", he asked, raising his eyebrows crossly. He could barely keep himself from insulting her again, partly because he did not want to eat her cooking, partly, even though he would not admit it to anyone, because he was angry with her for liking the lost boy so much.

"Then I would have tried to break it to him more gently, you know!", she exclaimed. "Damn it!"

"Well," he told her and suddenly stood up. "Now that this is cleared up, I think I'll go training for a while. See you later!"

"Where do you think you are going, Ranma?", she asked firmly and looked at him, the colour fading from her cheeks as quickly as the other martial artist from her mind. "Dinner's ready to be served."

"Eh, you know, I'm not hungry at all. Lunch...", he began, but was cut short by the young woman.

"Sit down!", she commanded him to take a seat. "Now!"

After he had caught a glimpse of his fiancée, had seen the murderous look upon her face and had felt her most dangerous aura, he sat down again without further ado and protest. Then Akane cut a slice of her self-made Tofu and placed it on his plate.

"Eat or die!", she told him and watched him closely.

Not for a second did Ranma doubt that her words were not an idle threat. Slowly and with utmost caution he took the fork as if it was poisoned and shoved a little bit of the Tofu into his mouth. He chewed twice before he convulsively stiffened. Then he dropped his fork, which hit the plate with a loud clangour, and stared at Akane, who had watched him hopefully.

"What?", he panted, looking at his plate in surprise. "What did you do?"

"It's that bad, huh?", she stated disappointedly, sounding a little sad.

"No, how did you do it?", he repeated, not reacting to her statement.

"What do you mean?", the short-tempered woman asked angrily. "I just followed the instructions. That's all!"

"What did you, how did you do it?", Ranma asked again, looking directly at her.

"Stop making fun of me!", Akane yelled and stood up, he aura blazing dangerously. "I didn't concentrate, okay?! I was trying to get into my role at that moment!"

"That's not what I meant, you know. Did you really... do it yourself? Because it's, well, kinda edible..."

Instantly Akane's blue aura vanished and she slumped onto the ground next to him, not knowing what to say, but nonetheless slightly blushing, gratefully smiling at him, taking a bite of her own food and happily winking. The two martial artists ate their supper in complete silence, the young man totally surprised that the food was indeed edible and not poisoned, the young woman that he had complimented her cooking skills. In tacit consent Akane turned the television on.

"I, eh, I'm glad you liked it," she stammered nervously, sat down on the couch and beckoned him over.

"Hmm," he answered, sitting shyly down on the far end of the couch. "I didn't say I li..."

"P-chan!"

Akane interrupted him, pointed at a little black spot in the garden and jumped up. Then she ran past a stunned martial artist and into the garden in order to welcome her pet. The piglet, however, desperately tried to avoid its master, jumped away and hid behind a tree, but its efforts were in vain. The young woman caught Ryoga and hugged him lovingly.

"That guy really has no sense of direction," Ranma swore furiously under his breath, after he had come out into the garden. "Akane?"

"P-chan is home, Ranma," she told him, rubbing her nose cheerfully against the piglet's and smiling brightly. "Isn't that wonderful?"

"Yeah, wonderful," he growled at her, walking towards his fiancée. "Well, P-chan, it's been years! Were have you been? Lost again?"

"Don't pick on him, Ranma!", the young woman scolded him and smiled at her pet. "Don't worry, P-chan, it's only been a..."

The martial artist knew that he had to act as quickly as possible, but he did not know how to silence his fiancée. He grimaced and shook his head, but the woman in front of him only had eyes for her pet. Suddenly an idea rushed into his mind. Blushing furiously, he placed his hands on her shoulders and embraced the beautiful girl warmly. Immediately the young woman let the piglet, which ran away without once turning around, fall to the ground.

"Week," she breathed quietly, enjoying the warmth his body was radiating. Closing her eyes, Akane's chest tightened just a little, a strange, tingling sensation in her stomach made her feel just a little light-headed and her heart beat just a little faster than normal. A second later the young woman came to her senses again and pushed him away.

"W-what do-do you think you-you're doing?", she whispered and turned as red as a beet.

"It's not what it looks like," he defeated himself, blushing right up to the ears as well. Ranma desperately wanted her to know all about Ryoga, but his oath silenced him, even though he just wanted to protect her honour. He bit his lip and stared at the ground.

"W-wait a moment," she suddenly said, implying that something dawned on her. "Could it be that.... you're jealous of P-chan?"

"No, I'm not!", he exclaimed hastily and blushed even more as he saw his fiancée's grin. "Why should I be jealous? Hell, I-I don't wanna sleep in your bed!"

"Oh, Ranma, who could have thought that I, the uncute, sexless tomboy, could make you jealous?", she joked, although his words had roused the wild beast within her chest again, and then whispered softly into his ear: "Well, we'll see about that, because tonight we are going to sleep on the couch together..."

"W-w-w-w-what?!", he breathed, his whole body – even his pigtail – stiffening, while the colour of his blush turned to a fiery red.

"I-I-I'm go-going t-to s-s-sleep on-on the couch w-while you're going to sleep on the floor next to me," she stammered and laughed herself to tears, holding her sides. "You-your expression is priceless!"

"You are so uncute!", he grumbled, having recovered from the shock.

"W-well," she answered, still laughing at him. "At least I'm not a pervert. By the way, remind me of that after this is over."

"Yeah, like hell I will," he cursed angrily under his breath, trying hard to conceal his blush. "Damn it, why should I sleep on the floor?"

"It's a necessary precaution", she answered, wiped her tears away, turned around and walked into the house again. "Just imagine somebody would come over and we slept in different rooms. Wouldn't that be awkward for a married couple? Anyway, I wonder why P-chan ran away..."

"Maybe because you are so uncute," he mumbled as he trotted behind her. "I'll go get my stuff."

The female martial artist nodded and settled back on the couch while the young man slowly walked into his room, changed into his pyjama, picked his futon up and went back downstairs. Grumpily he let it drop to the floor next to the couch and lay down.

"What's on TV?", he asked, yawning.

"There's this horror film, you know?", she said, looking questioningly at him.

"Fine by me," he answered, closed his eyes for a second and fell asleep at once. Suddenly, however, he heard a shriek. Instantly he jumped up and jerked his head around, but could not see anyone but his fiancée.

"What's up?", he sleepily asked.

The young woman said nothing, but trembled with fear. Having closed her eyes, she then, slowly, very slowly, raised her shivering arm and pointed at a spot behind Ranma. Hastily he turned around and saw the television.

"Aw, don't tell me..."

"It was scary!", she whimpered. "Could you, you know, maybe sit down on the couch?"

"Do I have to? I mean, come on, this is just a film. I'm damn tired and I wanna sleep," he answered.

"Please?", she pleaded with him, looking at him with her sweet, hazel eyes.

Breathing a deep sigh, Ranma slumped on the couch next to his fiancée. He saw her somewhat relieved expression and tried hard not to fall asleep again, concentrating on the commercial, while Akane drew her knees to her chest and embraced them tightly with her arms. Soon, however, he found that he could hardly keep his eyes open anymore and seconds later he slowly drifted off to sleep again.

Just moments later the young martial artist felt a weight on his right shoulder, blinked twice, because he did not know where he was, yawned and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. Then he turned his head around and nearly jumped up in surprise. His fiancée's head lay on his shoulder and the young woman slept deeply.

The young man blushed furiously, but did not dare to move, because he feared that his fiancée could wake up and accuse him of being a pervert. He thought that his situation could not get any worse when he turned his head and saw the silhouette of a person standing in the living-room. As the person moved closer to him, his eyes bulged, because he recognized his best friend, Ukyo.

"We need to talk," she mouthed and beckoned him to follow her. "Now!"

Soundlessly and carefully he stood up, placed his fiancée's head gently on the couch, switched off the television and followed his best friend into the training hall. Just a few minutes later the blue-haired woman stirred in her sleep and finally woke up, because something was missing. She looked around and noticed that her fiancé was neither lying on the couch nor on his futon.

Slowly she sat up. Suddenly, however, she heard a woman's voice. Curiously she followed the voice until she could see that the light in the training hall had been switched on. As quietly as possible she walked to the door and took a peek at the inside.

"Ukyo," the black-haired martial artist said, kneeling in front of the young woman.

"This," she said, raised her giant spatula and smacked him with it. "Is for making me wait all this time."

Akane crouched down in front of the door, her aura blazing, because her fiancé talked with another woman in the middle of the night. She opened the door a little more and watched them through the crack of the door. For a split second she thought that they had noticed her, but then Ukyo raised her spatula again.

"This," she said, hitting him again. "Is for you stupidity."

Akane dared to open the door a little more as Ranma moaned in pain.

"And this," she finally whispered seductively, helped the barely conscious man up, embraced him tightly and rubbed her nose against his. "Is for your great plan."

"Rrrranma!"

The female martial artist rushed through the door, her flaming, blue aura surrounding her. Beside herself with rage she stepped closer to the couple, clenching her fists. Akane did not know why she was a good deal more furious than normal, why every beat of her heart pained her so much that she wanted to cry or why a volley of his words rang in her ears, all of them, whether kind or insulting, pleasant or hot, churlish or doll, goading her into becoming even more furious, but she knew that her dear fiancé was about to pay for it.

"Let go of her," she said in a dangerously calm way.

"I ain't holdin' her!", Ranma claimed, not knowing what was going on.

"Hey, honey," Ukyo suddenly interfered in their quarrel, let go of Ranma and looked defiantly at her rival. "Well, I guess we've got to tell her, Ranma-honey."

"Tell her what?"

"Ah, don't be shy," she told him, hitting him playfully. "We've got to tell her that it was all a scheme to get rid of our suitors, the last one being her. I'm sorry, Akane."


	5. Resolution: The Craziness Continues!

**Resolution: The Craziness Continues?!**

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Ranma ½. It all belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. Bla blubb!

_Ich möchte mich noch einmal bei all jenen bedanken, die mich so lieb unterstützt und ermutigt haben!_

_Thank you all very much for your support and encouragement. I really appreciated it!_

_Thank you: SuperLardBucket, epain, jd, Shadowalker666, James Birdsong, Hitman25ad, vleroy728, TL, XxkanaxX, ca-chan, Angela Jewell, Mystical-Dreamer57, uzukun7, Shidoin and all the others I forgot to mention. Thank you all so much! _

Instantly Akane's bright blue aura vanished. Her shoulders slumped and she averted her eyes as some lonely tears won their fight against the woman's stubbornness and pride and ran down her cheeks. Staring blankly at the ground, because she could not stand the sight of him holding Ukyo, the blue-haired martial artist walked slowly towards her fiancé.

Suddenly she saw his shoes and looked up at him. For a split second a pair of hazel eyes met a pair of blue ones. And for once she had caught him off-guard. She could read all the emotions he usually hid so carefully: he was surprised, confused and above all worried. As he saw her tears, his expression changed rapidly. Helplessly but warmly he looked into her eyes and Akane could feel his perfect sincerity. A pleasant feeling of warmth spread throughout her body. Realizing that he still held his other fiancée in his arms, though, it swiftly vanished into thin air. The young woman smiled bitterly and slapped his face with all her strength, before turning around and storming away.

"Ucchan, leggo of me," Ranma growled, struggled with her for a moment and then shoved her roughly away, not seeing, not caring that his best friend fell to the ground. "Akane, you tomboy!"

"You dare?", she croaked, immediately stopping dead in her tracks, her aura blazing anew. "You dare to insult me?!"

"Yeah, I dare," he bellowed at her. "It's not what it looks like and it's definitely not my fault!"

"Yeah, right," Akane sneered her reply, impersonating her fiancé. "Wow, Akane, it's not what it looks like. I was the kissee here, not the kisser."

"We didn't even k-k-kiss!"

"Oh, but you would have if I hadn't interrupted," she cried, looking at the ceiling. "Well, don't mind me, you jerk. Oh, by the way, are you trying to get off with every girl you meet or was it just me?"

"I-I, what?", he seethed, his cheeks reddening with anger. "I ain't that old lecher! I don't hit on girls and I definitely wasn't hitting on you, tomboy!"

"Yeah?", she asked calmly, her aura nonetheless blazing dangerously. "And what about telling me that my cooking was edible? And what about sleeping on the couch with me?"

The martial artist did not answer. He stared nervously at the floor while he scratched the back of his head. Then, having mustered up the courage to tell her, he looked shyly at her and opened his mouth. Before he could say anything, though, they heard the clapping of hands. Perplexedly the two youths turned around to Ukyo.

"That was grand!", she exclaimed, applauded them, stood up and raised an eyebrow. "You two make such good actors, you know. Oh, don't tell me the first act is not over yet. I'm so sorry! Just go on."

"What? You know? How?", the young woman stammered, her aura vanishing.

"Honey, you would have killed him if you had caught us in a position like this," she explained and smiled cheerfully at her rival. "Besides, I met Ryoga two hours ago and he babbled something about you two being married, so I thought that you two may be up to something. Oh, and then your fiancé confessed to me how you got rid of Shampoo and Kuno just before you came in."

"He told you?"

"He told me."

"I had to!"

"You had to?

"He had to."

"Stop that!", Akane said and, after having darted an angry glance at her fiancée, closed her eyes, massaging her temples. "Great, Ranma, just great! Ukyo, what are you going to do now that you know about our scheme?"

"Nothing," the cook answered calmly. "We've fought with no holds barred for the last two years and I've lost to you. Honey, don't look at me like that. I know when a battle is lost and a martial artist has to accept defeat, even though it may hurt."

"I don't believe a word of it," the blue-haired woman replied, eyeing the other woman suspiciously. "You're just like Shampoo. You'll never give up on him! Why else would you be here?"

"I'm not like Shampoo at all," she answered with a sigh. "I've always been his friend, you know, and I just want him to make the right decision, but up to the failed wedding I've thought that I would be the best choice for him. Guess I was wrong, though, because you don't love me, do you, Ranma-honey?"

"Ucchan...", the martial artist answered feebly and grimaced, not knowing what to say without hurting his best friend. So he simply stared at the floor, his heart torn between telling her how he felt to clear things up and saying nothing in order to prevent himself from offending her feelings.

"It's okay, honey," she said quietly with a quavering voice. "You don't have to say it. I should have seen it coming a long time ago, but I think the eyes of love are almost as blind as Mousse. I just want you to be in good hands for once, because, whatever all the others may say, you deserve it, although you can be a jerk sometimes. Just promise me that we'll always be friends."

"I, of course, Ucchan," Ranma promised, smiling at her. "You're the best friend I have!"

"I know," she answered on the verge of tears and turned around to her former rival, who looked at her utterly bewildered. "May I show you how I know that he doesn't love me?"

"G-go a-ahead," Akane stuttered, shaking her head as if to convince herself that this was not a dream.

Ukyo gave her a friendly nod, turned around to her fiancé again, gulped back her tears and then wrapped her arms gently around his neck and kissed him. Softly she pressed her lips against his, deepening the kiss, while Ranma was too stunned to do anything. Akane, however, hissed furiously, her jealousy pumping through her veins like the deadliest poison. Suddenly the young man, who blushed furiously, withdrew from the kiss, though, and hastily stepped away from his best friend, whose tears wept freely now.

"D-don't b-be cross w-with me, honey," Ukyo sobbed, trying to smile away her tears, and then whispered to her rival: "If he loved me, he would have kissed me back. Just, just do me a favour and take good care of him. You won't find someone like him ever again."

Without another word the young cook turned around and ran away. Ranma hesitated for a moment and then tried to follow her only to find his way blocked by his fiancée. Her aura still blazed dangerously, but she gave him a charming smile.

"Just give her some time," the young woman suggested and, seeing his reluctant nod, asked casually: "So, how did you like the kiss?"

"I-what?", he stammered, his cheeks reddening again. "I, I d-didn't k-k-k-kiss her!"

"Oh, so what did you two do then?", she yelled, jealousy welling up in her again.

"She pressed her lips against mine!", he exclaimed. "That's not a k-kiss! That's worlds apart, because it takes two to do that, okay?!"

"Com'on, m'boy!", the two young adults heard a voice say, before Akane could answer. Hastily they turned around and saw Happossai, who held an enormous bottle in his left hand, entering the training hall. "Schee wantsch you to to to kisssss 'er."

Suddenly the old master hiccuped, weaved a few steps forward, propped against the wall of the training hall and closed his eyes for a moment. Having opened them again, he gulped down the content of the bottle, threw it away and sat down.

"Easch sip, a pleaschure trip!", he slurred, looking at them. "Want schome, too?"

"I think Nabiki forgot about him," the young woman spoke in his ear.

"Yeah, I think so, too," he answered. "No, you old lecher, I don't want none of your stuff. Where have you been anyway?"

"Out, drinking," he said and suddenly began to laugh, while getting a bra from his pocket. "My sschweet, sschweet Akane.... why don't you wear thisch bra for me?"

"No, I won't!", she shrieked in response and added under her breath: "And I thought he couldn't be any more perverted."

"Too bad, too, too bad," Happossai told her, clicking his tongue disapprovingly and standing up again. "Didn't want to, but think I have to tell that Schampoo about your scheme. Heard it all, 'cause I wasch lyin' in the busches outside."

Happossai grinned from ear to ear as he looked at their shocked expressions. Akane turned around and looked at her fiancé apologetically and painfully. Ranma's heart skipped a beat as he saw that she was ready to take this embarrassment upon herself to keep their secret. A familiar warm feeling of affection towards the young girl rushed through his body and he gave her a quick smile.

"No, she won't," he then answered firmly.

"Then how 'bout you, m'boy?", the old man asked hopefully, holding the bra out to his favourite student. "Would look great on you!"

"He won't wear a bra, because he's not a woman!" Before either the grandmaster or his student could react, the young woman had rushed forward, kicked the old martial artist and sent him flying through the ceiling.

"You'll pay for that!", the man yelled.

"Eh, well, thank you," the young man said, looking nervously at his fiancée.

"Eh, you-you're welcome," she answered with a smile. "Well, that's it, huh? No fiancée's, no suitors, no lunatics?"

"I guess so," he said, walking back into the house with his fiancée.

Only hours later, however, they had to find out that it was far from over. Sitting snugly on the couch and watching television, the two martial artist suddenly heard voices in the hall. Before they could stand up, though, their families and an old grandmaster entered the living-room, chatting cheerfully and smiling broadly at the young adults.

"Nabiki? Kasumi? Dad? Mr. Saotome?", Akane asked in surprise as she saw her two sisters. "What are you doing here?"

"What a warm welcome," Nabiki answered, smirking at her little sister. "You really missed us, didn't you?"

"No, I mean yes," she stammered, trying to explain what she meant. "I just thought you would be away a little longer."

"Oh, and what's that supposed to mean, young lady?", her dad asked, raising his eyebrows.

"I-I-I, Ranma, help me!"

"Isn't that cute?", Kasumi said, seeing that her little sister's fiancé was just as surprised as Akane. "We are here, because Happossai told us to. He said he wanted us to hear something very important. Why don't we sit down and listen to what he has to say?"

"Yeah, you kicked him directly into our hotel, Akane, " continued Nabiki, grinning and taking a seat next to them. "And then we talked about you and Ranma and that you owe me a favour. Well, to cut a long story short, he paid me a good deal to get that favour. I wanted to ask whether you fantasized about you having sex with your fiancé, but Happossai wants to know whether you're in love with him."

"I-I, w-what? Nabiki?", the young woman stuttered, blushing as red as a beet and looking anywhere but at Ranma. Her heart beat furiously as she tried to buy herself some time, ignoring the '_That's not fair, Nabiki Tendo! I want to ask that, too!_' screams.

"H-how did you pay her anyway, Happossai?"

"I, that's not important right now," he answered, beginning to sweat.

"How did you do it, master Happossai?", his two students asked simultaneously as they saw his reaction and stood up.

"I-I-I..."

"Yes, master?"

"I sold the training hall."

"Nihao, airen!", they heard a familiar voice, before they could do or say anything at all. Then a purple-haired Amazon, clad in a skimpy dress, entered the room, followed by a duck and an old witch. "Shampoo buy training hall, so airen no marry violent kitchen wrecker."

"Who are you calling a kitchen wrecker?", Akane asked furiously, but her voice was drowned by the noise their fathers caused by swooping down on the old grandmaster.

"How could you sell the training hall?!"

"Shampoo," Cologne suddenly shrieked loudly. "How did _you_ buy the training hall?"

"Sold Cat Café to spatula girl, who employ boy with no sense of direction to work."

"_Shampoo_!!"

Ranma and Akane looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders, turned around, smiled and took a bow.

"Thank you for reading this story. And, eh, don't mind them," she said, pointing at her father and Mr. Saotome, who tried to beat their grandmaster up, Cologne, who shouted at her great-granddaughter, Shampoo, who batted her eyelashes at her fiancé, Nabiki, who took pictures, and Kasumi, who shook her head disapprovingly. "It's your turn, Ranma!"

"Oh yeah," he said. "Thank you! And now get outta here!"

"Ranma!", she scolded him. "I'm sorry, my dear reader. There might be another chapter in store for you, but that depends on your reviews. Anyway, thank you very much! See you!"


End file.
